The Center of the Universe

I had an idea for a coffee-table book and I thought it was pretty awesome.  It combines both literary and photographic art and will be the most honest book you'll ever crack open.

It'll be called the "Center of the Universe," and it'll consist of a very simple formula.  I take pictures of my penis and I write poetry for the picture.  Now before your thoughts wander off I just want to clarify that these dick-pics won't just be some boring mugshots, because if that were the case I'd rename it "Gary Busey, the Legacy."  No, these pictures will be majestic.  Like my penis with a cowboy hat leaning on a railing watching the sun set. 

Marlboro Dick aside, I think this book would be a hit.  It has the every man appeal and also the coffee-table book collector appeal.  Not to mention, it'd really jumpstart my career as an edgy artist.

I had some time to myself and I decided to give a sample of a poem, the picture will come in a later post eventually, I guarantee.

Fierce and quick,

he's the first pick.

My penis rises above many,

transmits like antennae.

For as they say:

It is not the size of the boat,

at least I hope because I have a small penis and I'm extremely self-conscious.